Australian humour

"The country itself is the ultimate joke; the wave you body-surf into shore after a day at the beach could contain a shark or a rip-tide and, when you get back, your house could have been burnt to the ground in a bush fire. That's where the whole 'no worries' thing comes from."
Mark Little- actor

ristics of the Australian sense of humour
When first coined, the term 'Larrikin' referred to street criminals and was uttered in same breath as rapscallions, hooligans, and scallywags. In contemporary times, it is applied to anyone with an Australian sense of humour. Larrikin humour tends to be good natured, self-depreciating, and quite subtle.

While larrikin humour has traditionally been used to define Australian humour, in the last decade it has been on the wane. In its place, a political form of humour based around saracasm and insults has come to prominence. The most notable exponents of the humour are a comedy team known The Chaser. The Chaser grew out a newspaper started by a group of friends who met in private schools while growing up in Sydney's northern beaches. Given their geographic and private school background, their humour is anything by larrikin in style.

Australian jokes and jokes about Australians

1) Larrikin humour

Black

When comforting someone who is dying of cancer, it probably isn't tactful to joke about how much one is enjoying a mini-series. Yet such black humour is one of the most notable aspects of Australian comedy. For example, when a serial killer kidnapped backpackers and buried their bodies in the Belangalo State Forest, a hardware shop in Moss Vale (near the forest) began selling souvenir shovels with the letters 'B.S.F' engraved upon them. Similarly, when seven bodies where discovered decomposing in barrels of acid in the country town of Snowtown, the town's stores began selling souvenir coffee mugs with captions such as "come to Snowtown, you'll have a barrel of a time."

In 1967 Prime Minister Harold Holt went for a swim at a Portsea beach and was never seen again. As a mark of 'respect', construction soon began on the Harold Holt Memorial Swimming Pool.

Psychologists have offered two different explanations for the origins of black humour. The first is 'incongruity theory.' Incongruence is caused when someone experiences conflicting motivations after being presented with disparate ideas. For example, if someone wants to like Australians but also believes one should respect the dead, they will have conflicting motivations about the Snowtown souvenir mugs. This attitude incongruence may cause one of the attitudes to 'give'. For example, they may decide they don't like Australians anymore or decide they don't care about disrespecting the dead. If attitude change is not a desirable outcome, the person may just laugh and then move on.

The second theory is a 'catharsis release'. Freudian psychologists believe that humour allows people to release tension associated with difficult experiences. This helps them address those issues that they can not openly discuss. For example in the Convict era, Convict etiquette demanded suffering in silence whilst the law considered complaints as insolence and punished it with flogging. As both Convict etiquette and the law prevented the Convicts from discussing their emotional distress, they were forced to make jokes to deal with their emotional turmoil.

The same kind of needs are still expressed today. When Australian comic Bill Leak found out that his mate had lost his right-big toe in an accident, Leak had confused emotions. Although he could have sent flowers and a get well card, instead he sent a thong with big toe attached in the appropriate position and a note: 'Glue here.'

Upside down

Australian humour is often upside down. The joke almost seems to be that the label is the opposite to what it should be. For instance, Australians take delight in dubbing a tall man "Shorty", a silent one "Rowdy" a bald man "Curly", and a redhead is "Blue". A bastard may mean a good bloke. Likewise, larrikin, wog, and mongrel may all be used as terms of endearment.

Belittling the wowser

Although humour is used to strengthen friendships, it is also used to demean those who are too serious. Anyone who promotes a sense of moral decency inevitably invites ridicule. In 1832, the Governor of Tasmania prepared to deliver a moral speech to the female Convicts at the Cascade Female Factory. When he approached the elevated dais, "the three hundred women turned right around and at one impulse pulled up their clothes showing their naked posteriors which they simultaneously smacked with their hands making a loud and not very musical noise..... In a rare moment of collusion with the Convict women, the ladies in the Governor's party could not control their laughter."

In contemporary times, wowsers are demeaned in the annual Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gra. Assimilationalist Pauline Hanson and moral crusader Fred Nile are featured in floats that question their sexuality or mock their overly serious expressions. As for the crowd, they are continuingly mooned so as to cut down any onlookers that possess a high command of morality.

A lawyer by the name of O'Sullivan even lionised mooning in an attempt to get his aboriginal client, James Albert Ernest Togo, off the hook for baring his buttocks at a policeman. O'Sullivan argued that " mooning was accepted Australian behaviour and should be seen as a national icon." The police prosecutor, Michael Purcell, asked in response "whether bare buttocks should replace the emu and kangaroo on Australia's coat of arms."

During the Sydney Olympics, Roy and H.G unveiled the lewd and rude Fatso the Fat arsed wombat as the mascot of their show, The Dream. Fatso was posed in a perpetual moon and comic animations depicted him waddling across the TV screen leaving little nuggets as a reminder of his grace.

Aimed at themselves

An Australian's humour is often self-depreciating. For example, a cerebral palsy sufferer by the name of Steady Eddy turned his disability into an asset by making a comic routine about it. In his quest for love, he recounted that upon seeing a beautiful girl, he often wished: " if only she had a limp..."

Aside from being directed at oneself, humour may also be directed towards ones racial group. For example, Australians of Greek extraction occasionally reminisce about their upbringing; fondly recalling their mothers teaching them how to put on their underwear - yellow at the front and brown at the back, or how their fathers gave them gold chains so they would know where to stop shaving.

Self-depreciation is also common on a national level. During the opening of the Sydney Olympics, an obviously drunk Governor General pronounced "Sa-sa-Sydney" and then knocked over the microphone. It was a shameful performance that would have had most countries scared that they world would think they are being led by a socially inept buffoon!! Oddly, most Australians just found it funny, and even speculated that if he got sacked for being pissed on the job, he may have a career as a rap singer to fall back on.

Aimed at friends

Somewhat paradoxically, to make a joke at a mate's expense is to signal a sense of comfort in the strength of the friendship. On the goldfields in the 1850's, to blow up a mate's dunny was considered hilarious whilst 'mongrel', 'galah' and 'bastard' were terms of endearment.

On an international level, despite being shafted at Gallipoli, Australians probably get on better with Pomes than any other nationality. At the very least, Poms have helped Australians out by taking the likes of Our Kylie and Germain Greer off their hands. Curiously, the level of piss-taking between the two countries is also extremely high. Poms have been known to define an Australian as someone "who reads comic books without moving their lips". They have also stated an Australian gentlemen is "someone who offers to light his girlfriend's farts."

The Australian retort is often a little different. Rather than rattle off a one liner, Australians tend to personalise an English stereotype by applying it directly to the individual standing in front of them. For example, upon meeting a Pom at Bondi Beach, an Australian might say he saw him earlier and knew he was English judging by the way he was trying to surf white-water, by his resemblance to a tomato or the abundance of flies surrounding him. In a bar, an Australian may welcome an Englishmen with a handshake and a warm 'g'day mate' only to then introduce him to other patrons with make a public announcement that there Pom is in the house and wallets should be kept under guard. In front of his new friend, he may then inform the barman that he requires another drink as "he is as dry as a pommy towel" in reference to the aversion Poms have to bathing.

Australians also have a reasonable relationship with the Kiwis and accordingly, have the insults to boot. They may speculate that there so many Kiwis are living in Sydney so they can go up Blue Mountains way where the abundance of cliffs has the sheep backing up harder. They may even speak fondly of Kiwi produce, citing the lamb is especially tender due to loving New Zealand farmers.

Like the English, the Kiwis like to make jokes about the lack of Australian intelligence. In 2004, it seemed that both the jokes about the Kiwi's love of sheep and Australian's lack of intelligence indeed had an element of truth in them. To compensate it for taking for 52,000 Australian sheep, Australia paid Eritrea, an African country, $A1 million ($NZ1.16 million) in addition with 3000 tonnes of feed. In Kiwi eyes, the deal made Australians look quite stupid, and the Kiwis let their thoughts be known. In Australian eyes; however, the Kiwis were just upset about a potential love boat being sent in the wrong direction, and were letting their emotions be known.

Relations with nations such as America aren't quite as strong and perhaps it is no co-incidence that such countries are less inclined to either take or give the piss. For example, simple attempts at hilarity involving George Bush's inability to eat a pretzel, let alone lead his country, invariably raise the ire of Americans who rush to their president's defence. Unfortunately, a situation of mirth may then descend into fisticuffs.

Breaking the rules

In the colonial era, the ability to make a policeman laugh may have been the difference between the gallows and freedom. A notable exponent of such comedy was a convict of African extraction by the name of Billy Blue. Billy wore a discarded military uniform, a top hat and and possessed a repertoire of jokes that flowed like fine wine. So well did he endear himself to the authorities, they 'believed' his claims that rather they be an alcohol smuggler, he kept finding liquor floating in Sydney harbour and had been stopped before he had a chance to report it to the authorities.

Daniel Gordon, another convict of African extraction, faced court expecting to receive a death sentence. When he appeared in the dock, Daniel was wild and incoherent in a performance that smacked of a praise-the-lord pastor crossed with a black and white minstrel. Everyone from other convicts to the court clerk thought he was acting. Fortunately, the usually sceptical judge deemed him mentally unfit for trial. When his condition failed to improve, the case was called off. Daniel eventually died 32 years later, aged 81.

When full-figured cricket player Shane Warne was found guilty of using a banned diuretic, he pleaded that he was just trying to lose weight to look good for the cameras. He even threw in a few fat jokes, for example that he was tired of being teased about having "more chins than a Chinese phonebook." Instead of being given the standard two year suspension, Shane was only banned for one year. Perhaps this indicates that his jokes were given a bare pass mark.

Lewd

In many countries, a night with a prostitute is something one would admit to only if one wanted to associate oneself with an English conservative party politician. Judith Lucy not only had sex with a prostitute, she subsequently used it as material for her national show.

A group of artists from the stage show 'Puppetry of the Penis' have also used humour to smash the boundaries of civilised conduct. On stage, naked men manipulate their genitals to resemble hamburgers and atomic mushrooms.

Marketers also use lewd comedy to build brand identity and awareness. Entrepreneur Dick Smith built an Australian image for his brand of matches by christening them Dick Heads, a word play on the rival redheads brand.

The fool

The loveable fool is a source of endless hilarity for Australians. It seems no movie worth its salt lacks a token village idiot. In The Castle, the hero is an odd fella who looks at powerlines but doesn't see a cancer threat, rather he sees a sign of human progress. One of his sons fancies himself as a 'wheeler and dealer' and searches the Trading Post for acquisitions. One morning he comes across a pair of jousting sticks. With a facial expression that leaves no doubt he has realised their potential, he inquires with the old man about making an offer. When his bemused wife points out that he has no need for jousting sticks, his explanation is that they "couldn't come up very often".

For Australians, it is a very funny scene.

Cynical

Australians are a cynical bunch. Unfortunately, they are faced with a dilemma as if they express there criticism they may be called a whingeing pom, an elitist wanker or even worse, a wowser.

The clever Australians resolve this quandary by disguising their criticisms as jokes. Tony Martin expressed his distaste for the commentators of a commercial television station by saying:

"Channel nine's pissing me off at the moment, is it just me or does anyone else hate the cricket as much as I do? Because I'm sorry, but when I turn on the TV and it's just like 12 blokes in white clothes, standing in a field..like all day and Tony Greg says "Well it just doesn't get much more exciting that this." I beg to differ, I'm sorry, I just do..Max Walker was hosting the AFL last year and somebody said to him, "Grand final Max, what d'ya reckon?" "Well I tell ya what, Grand final, it's a pretty big day for football." Well thanks for that Max. Cheque's in the mail. Very nicely done."

Finally, convicted criminal Chopper Reid put in his two cents on police brutality:

"The tough approach at least produced tougher crooks, not like today. When the police questioned via the use of fist, boot and baton it produced a tough, hard breed of stand up criminal".

Australian animal jokes

Australia is a land full of strange things animals that many people around the world have difficulty believing are true. For example, for most people around the world, it is bizarre to think an animal such as a kangaroo could exist. Not other country has animals that have a pouch, give birth to babies less than an inch long and hop around on two legs. Likewise, no other country has animals like the platypus, which lay eggs, suckle young, have a mouth like a duck and fur like a rat. In fact, when a platypus specimen was first sent to England, the English thought Australians had played a joke on them by sewing the mouth of a duck to a rat.

As the world has become accustomed to the unbelievable being possible in Australia, Australians have exploited the world’s belief by arguing that very ridiculous things occur in Australia. Americans have been told than kids ride in the pouch of a kangaroo to school. Europeans have been told that Australia is populated by dropbears, an evil species of territorial kolas that drop from trees to claw and bit at the neck. To ward off the danger, they should wear a bicycle helmet when walking in the bush. Some foreigners have even been fooled into thinking that in Australia there is a Hoop snake that takes its tail in its mouth and then goes bowling merrily along.

Inaccurate stereotypes

Australians often make jokes about the inaccuracy of stereotypes. Many of examples could be seen in the movie Crocodile Dundee. In the movie, wealthy reporter Sue Charlton (Linda Kozlowski) hears about the heroic tale of survival of Mick Dundee (Paul Hogan) and flies to the outback to verify his story. As they travel to the outback, Mick uses good natured dishonesty to win her charms. Mick secretly uses a razor to shave, but when he hears her coming, he pulls out a huge knife and pretends to shave with it. He looks at his mate's watch then pretends he can tell the time by looking at the sky.

One night, the two are visited by one of Mick's Aboriginal mates, Neville Bell, on his way to a corroboree. Sue tries to take the man's picture, but Neville says:

"You can't take my picture"

Sue responds:

"You are afraid it will take away your spirit"

Neville answers:

"No. You got lens cap on."

Neville then wanders off into the bush. Sue asks Mick how his finds his way in the dark. Mick says: "telepathy." Then there is the sound of the blackfella walking into a tree, and an anguished cry:

"I hate the bush."

The underlying message behind the jokes is that stereotypes of Australians are not always accurate, but that Australians like to have fun with them anyway.

2)Left-wing Humour

As left-wingers have gained a more prominent role in Australian society, they have in turn transformed world stereotypes about Australian humour. Whereas the world used to see the likes of Paul Hogan making clever jokes about knive sizes, now they see the likes of The Chaser declaring that they are at war with everything. The Chaser grew out a newspaper started by a group of friends who met in Sydney's private schools. Given their private school background, their humour is anything by larrikin.

One of the group's most famous comedy acts was a Eulogy song insulting those icons admired by Australians, particularly working class Australians. Race car driver Peter Brock was insulted for being anti-green while Steve Irwin was insulted for being mean to animals. A deliberate point was made that the likes of Belinda Emmet, another northern suburbs' girl who was the wife of left-wing comedian Rove MacManus, should not be insulted. In some ways, the jokes tried to keep alive the piss-taking tradition seen in larrikin humour, however the jokes lacked the same wit and they were directed at others rather than themselves. Arguably, the jokes got a laugh more out of a desire by the audience to belong rather than any true wit. For example, an objective world commentator would struggle to understand why a line such as, "Don Bradman was a total farce, a grumpy, greedy tired-arse, who couldn't even score one run last time he played " could bring people to stiches. If comedy was that easy, then primary school kids should be the future of comedy.

The Eulogy Song by the Chaser

My great grand father died this week.
I couldn’t stand him actually nobody could.
But as soon as he passed away everybody went around saying what a top bloke he was, so..
I’d like to dedicate this song to you, Gramps.
He was very hard of hearing,
he was dull and domineering,
mysogenist cantankerous and vain.
He hit the bottle every night,
he hit my grandma out of spite,
and those stories about his bunyons were a pain.
But all that’s now forgotten,
once he took his final breath.
Yes even pricks turn into top blokes after death. (Audience laughs)

You don’t believe me?
Allow me to furnish you with a few examples..
Steve Irwin lived in khaki,
a cartoon kamikaze,
who taunted crocs and tots so frequently.
And Brocky was some revhead,
who pumped the air with pure lead,
so anti green he drove into a tree. (Audience laughs)

But all that was forgotten,
once they took their final breath.
Yes even tools turn into top blokes after death.
John Lennon chose the hippy life,
he chose some nutbag for a wife,
his songs were never quite as good as Paul’s. (Audience laughs)

Jeff Buckley fooled all lovers,
just one album, mostly covers,
more wailing than Japan does off our shores. (Very big laugh from audience)

But all that was forgotten,
once he took his final breath,
yes even wankers turn into top blokes after death. (Audience giggles)

Princess Di was just a slut for sex,
when they looked in the car wreck,(Audience laughing even before punchline)
her dress was wet with Arab semen stain. (Audience in hysterics)

Stan Zemanek was a racist,
Dr Fatso xenophobic cock,
whose views were more malignant than his brain. (Audience laughs)

But all that was forgotten,
once he took his final breath,
yes even arseholes turn into top blokes after death.
It’s not how they lived that counts,
but how we rewrite the book.
When it comes to truth it’s best to use restraint,
it pays to throw away the facts
and have a rose coloured look.
When he dies, Martin Bryant will look a saint.
Don Bradman was a total farce,
a grumpy, greedy tired-arse,
who couldn’t even score one run last time he played. (Audience laughs)

Kerry Packer was a brothel chief,
a tax cheat and a kidney thief.
and procreating Jamie was the worst mistake he made. (Audience laughs)

But all that was forgotten,
once he took his final breath,
yes even **** turn into top blokes after death. (Huge laugh, presumbly for having a word censored)

Belinda Emmett was a… (stopped by cast) (Big cheer for not insulting Belinda Emmet)

Remember all will be forgotten,
once we take our final breath..
yes even pervert motherf**kers,
even rampant child-abusers,
even local Baghdad looters,
even baby bunny rooters,
even reckless drunken drivers,
even rodent sperm imbibers,
even violent poofter bashers,
even public penis flashers,
even rotting corpse molesters,
even human piss ingesters,
even tiny kitten kickers,
even anal finger lickers, (giggle)
even Anna ‘bloody’ Coren,
yes even she will be a top bloke after death. (Big laugh and claps)

In adition to insults, left-wing humour revolves around sarcasm, and holding up extreme examples of Australian working class culture that can be ridiculed. One of the most notable examples is Kath and Kim. The jokes usually have some form of behaviour that can be cringed at. For example,

"And Sharon got kicked out for doing a wee between two cars and Mum won the prize for the loudest singing on the train home!!"

Fans of Kath and Kim love mimicking the jokes and sarcastically saying names "Shazza" and "Wozza" whenever someone talks about Australian culture. For left-wingers, the appeal is that the premise of a joke gives an excuse to ridicule a strain of Australian culture that they don't identify with.